Museum Day

Somehow, without Bill to keep me from overplanning, I've only scheduled 3 things: Uffizi at 9:30, Accademia at 4:00 and dinner at Insolita Trattoria Tre Soldi at 7:30. Surely I won't over do it. Also, I managed to forget to pack a water bottle and a micro-USB to USB-C cable, so I'll be adding photos much later, but hopefully before this actually posts. I suppose it will be someone a surreal post if I don't quite get to adding photos.

A pleasant stroll through town in the morning, when it isn't too hot yet:

The hotel receptionist insists that I cross this bridge at some point, but not quite this morning:

After waiting in line to pick up my Uffizi ticket, I have a few minutes to wander around Piazza della Signoria:

Once in the museum, it's stairs. Like, let's go down a couple of flights stairs, wander in circles, and then climb several flights of steps to get to the gallery. Part of my preparatory walking for this trip has, fortunately, been uphill. The museum is a long hall of sculptures with galleries periodically off to each side. Below are Hercules slaying the Centaur Nessus, Nymph with a panther, and

My first thought was that Adonis was holding a selfie stick. Brain eventually arrived at relay, but took a while:

Photo of me in a couple of hours:

A few virtues from a larger set of panels:

Spring:

One of the famous works here is Birth of Venus, and seeing it makes me feel a bit old. When I first saw this painting, Venus was a woman, but on this side of 40, she looks like a child.

Art seems to be grouped by period or theme. I dubbed this room "death from above" as that seems to be a concern for every sculpture:

Florence is hot, but not Alabama humid, so doing a bit of walking through the city after the museum isn't too bad.

Eventually, I stopped for lunch at Enoteca Alessi, which offers an Amaro tasting:

Tasting notes from left to right:
1. Tastes very much like I expect an amaro to taste, but not as harsh
2. I'd guess this is cola nut based from the aroma, but not from the taste. Probably vanilla giving that cola aroma. Sweeter and smoother than expected, but with a good bitter finish
3. Medicinal but not harshly so. Smells much sweeter than it tastes.
4. Too bitter for me. So probably the winner in that Bill will love it and I can technically drink it.
5. Liquorish hell that lingers on the tongue. Like the worst. NyQuil without the sweetness. Also the highest alcohol content. A winner under some wretched criteria.
At this point, the waiter brings me some ice chips to dilute each and taste again. With the dilution, #3 is much more interesting and 4 opens up in a way that makes me suspect I will like it in a cocktail. 5 is still fucking terrible for someone who doesn't like liquorish.

After lunch, I wander through Basilica di San Lorenzo, which includes a museum of naturalist odds and ends owned by the Medici family:

Also Donatello's final resting place:

Eventually, it's time to meet up with my tour group for Accademia. This is a guided tour that includes seeing David. Most of the participants are American and have overplanned their day, scheduling themselves for something else part way through the tour. They spend their time checking thier watches instead of looking at art, and leave me on essentially, a private tour of the museum.

I then make the mistake of walking to dinner, which takes almost an hour, but has some interesting graffiti along the way:

Dinner is at Insolita Trattoria Tre Soldi, a place that does a blind tasting menu where after each course, you guess what you ate before they tell you. For the first course, I am told to "spread it on the bread in the box like a normal tube of mayonnaise" and wonder if I am in over my head as I have no reference point for this.

It's an herb infused olive oil. Next out is a dish introduces as Tomato, Eggplant, Olive:

My guesses are cheese, baba ganoush, and tapanade with breadcrumbs. This turns out to be largely correct: ricotta jell coated in passionfruit, eggplant with tomato, and olives with ground up bread. Next up is the "Usual tartar":

It definitely seems to be beef, but the egg tastes like mango and I think the gel is balsamic vinegar. Actually, the gel is onion and while the meat is beef there is tabasco instead of mustard in the sauce. Next up, a dish called Burnt Taste Bud:

My guess: parsnip, brisket, parsley. Actual food: smoked potato, beef tongue and kale powder. I assure you the wine pairing helps alleviate the sting of being so consistently wrong. Next up, Cheesen't Burger:

I guess a pork slider, and that is correct, but also the cheese is bell peppers and the bbq sauce is wine must based. Next up, Not Cappuccino:

My guess: egg and spinach. Actual food: asparagus and mushroom broth. Next is Unusual Carbonara:

My guess: pork belly and I don't know what is not carbonara because I don't know what is carbonara. Actual food: Pork cheek and a complex explanation that the cheese is egg and the egg is cheese - egg grated on top and cheese used on the sauce. Next, So Tender You Can Cut It With Your Breadstick:

I definitely broke a breadstick trying to cut this. My guess: beef cheek and carrots. Bingo! Cooked in a stout. Let's start dessert with a Small Piece Of Cheese:

My guess: vanilla ice cream with strawberry vinegar caviar. Actual food: milk ice cream with parmesan and a sherry vinegar. Moving on to Not a Green Apple:

My guess: Panna Cotta in a white chocolate shell with some sliced apples and no idea what was on the spoon, a fruit juice of some kind? Actual food: cheesecake, but otherwise correct on the apple. The juice is apple, but doses with lemon because it wasn't tart enough. The final dessert course is not a guessing game. Having passed through the tasting gauntlet, I am rewarded with a passionfruit macaron, chocolate and hazelnut coated ice cream, and chocolate.

This was fun, but I did not see a single other diner the entire (Saturday) evening. I was in a side room with just 3 tables, so hopefully the main room was hopping? It is after 10 when this wraps up, and I opt to take a taxi back to the hotel and fall almost immediately to sleep.